Haven't blogged for quite a few months. Can say that I am lazy to. Tonight would be the 2nd time I watched a movie alone. Watched a romance movie "Boys Over Flowers" (花樣男子～FINAL～) at Cathay. Felt a little better after the show. Too many sweet scenes in the movie for me to be continuously depressed.
These few months weren't exactly great. Except maybe for that few days I spent in Tioman. Went through a lot of rubbish. Getting sick of the men - who keep giving me trouble. The best part, they don't see it because they only see their own individual problems. Collectively, they are a headache. Sometimes I wonder why my section is so problematic. In one book-in, I have 3 absentees, all from my section due to all sorts of reason. Some are obvious chao geng.
Feeling very down these few weeks. Fallen into my depression mood again. Can't seem to be interested in anything. ATEC stage 2 is starting coming Monday. I guess I can consider myself as ORD-ed after these 5 days.
Have a lot of mixed feelings, mainly negative ones that keep floating in my mind. Leaving the army soon, stepping out into society temporary before I enter university. Realised I can be quite an ignorant fool in society. Don't know simple general knowledge.
Honestly speaking, I feel very hesitant to find any more best or good friends. The feeling of disappointment just overwhelms me every time. When I thought I have found someone to pour my heart to, things just don't work out. The good friends that I have just don't seem to last. Ended up with a quarrel with ** that never resolved. And time didn't help the situation. Felt cheated, gullible and hurt because of **. ** didn't turn out to be who I thought he would be. ** was just passive in relationships, even in bgr. Think ** just finds me another friend. Maybe I expected too much from friends. "Through thick and thin, through the fire and waters" all these just seemed unpractical. In the end, I just find Man unreliable. Don't get offended if you see this because I just feel disappointed. And I am not a perfect man either.
Feeling very depressed. Don't feel appreciated many times. People either take it for granted or think I am stupid for doing those things. Since it doesn't really benefit me in the first place, why bother to do it, they say. I'm either naive or stupid. Wishfully thinking that others would be grateful to me. But what I do was actually redundant. Ever felt like wanting to help, but people think you're being extra. Or when after helping someone, he thinks that you should have done better. The feeling sucks. Only to make me feel more self-abased and useless.
I think I trust people too much. Rely on people too much.
Haven't blogged for quite a few months. Can say that I am lazy to. Tonight would be the 2nd time I watched a movie alone. Watched a romance movie "Boys Over Flowers" (花樣男子～FINAL～) at Cathay. Felt a little better after the show. Too many sweet scenes in the movie for me to be continuously depressed.
These few months weren't exactly great. Except maybe for that few days I spent in Tioman. Went through a lot of rubbish. Getting sick of the men - who keep giving me trouble. The best part, they don't see it because they only see their own individual problems. Collectively, they are a headache. Sometimes I wonder why my section is so problematic. In one book-in, I have 3 absentees, all from my section due to all sorts of reason. Some are obvious chao geng.
Feeling very down these few weeks. Fallen into my depression mood again. 怎么也打不起劲。 ATEC stage 2 is starting coming Monday. I guess I can consider myself as ORD-ed after these 5 days.
Have a lot of mixed feelings, mainly negative ones that keep floating in my mind. Leaving the army soon, stepping out into society temporary before I enter university. Realised I can be quite an ignorant fool in society. Don't know simple general knowledge.
Honestly speaking, I feel very hesitant to find any more best or good friends. The feeling of disappointment just overwhelms me every time. When I thought I have found someone to pour my heart to, things just don't work out. The good friends that I have just don't seem to last. Ended up with a quarrel with ** that never resolved. And time didn't help the situation. Felt cheated, gullible and hurt because of **. ** didn't turn out to be who I thought he would be. ** was just passive in relationships, even in bgr. Think ** just finds me another friend. Maybe I expected too much from friends. 什么有难同当、同甘共苦，似乎都不实际。到头来，只觉得人靠不住。 Don't get offended if you see this because I just feel disappointed. And I am not a perfect man either.
很郁闷。Don't feel appreciated many times. People either take it for granted or think I am stupid for doing those things. Since it doesn't really benefit me in the first place, why bother to do it, they say. 是我天真还是愚蠢。一相情愿觉得人家会感激我。而我其实所做的是多余的。Ever felt like wanting to help, but people think you're being extra. Or when after helping someone, he thinks that you should have done better. The feeling sucks. 只让我觉得更自卑、没用。
I think I trust people too much. Rely on people too much.
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