I'm now minutes from flying to Taiwan and it sucks. I really fear of the outfield I have to go through. 15 missions within 7 days is seriously no joke. I really hope I can pull through and come back in one piece.
See you guys in 3 weeks time... :(
These few weeks have been very tough on me. I haven't been out on Sundays for the past 2 weeks. This week I was out for half a Sunday. And the next 3 weeks I will be in Taiwan for training.
Feel very lonely not only because of all the stress I get in my course, but also because I don't get to do the things I used to do - like stay around in church talking to people, going out to watch movies. Now that I am having my off-in-lieu, no doubt it is a good thing. But I just come to realise that there isn't anyone I can ask to go out with other than my coy ppl. Not that I don't like that but I have been seeing them so much more often than the rest. Everyone is either in school, in camp or working.
Wanted to watch Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix, believe it's going to be a great show since I like Harry Potter quite a fair bit. But I'm going to watch it alone, which is kind of odd. And if I do not watch it today or tomorrow, the only time I can watch it is after mid-August when I'm back in Singapore. Or if I am crazy enough to watch it in mandarin in Taiwan.
Field camp this week was bad. Horrible. During defence ops, I just sat at my shellscrape many times stoning, falling into sleep. I cannot think; was overwhelmed with things to do and the deadlines I have to meet. In pitch darkness, I lose my whole set of OHP markers. Borrowed from friends to first find it water soluble and unsuitable. Then again, to find the marker out of ink. I was seriously devastated. At that point of time, I was so exhausted I cannot do anything. I wonder to myself why God must do all that at that point of time. Why must I lose my OHP markers, and have to borrow twice just to get a simple, usable OHP markers? I then subsequently lose the claymore mine bag. Frantically searching for it. The instructors did not expect us to sleep for the night and had to dig fire trenches. I had to creep out at 4 or 5 am trying to find some stupid bag which I do not know how it went missing. The fatigue nearly killed me.
Finally when I just thought that grandslam will be over and I can go back to church after 2 weeks, some equipment was lost. Being a controlled equipment only meant that we had to be confined. Best of all, my platoon had to do it in the wee hours of the morning - right after grandslam just ended, how fun. Totally exhausted, we had to take the combat train back to the 12km route we took and re-walk the entire stretch. We started at 12, ended at 5am. I was practically sleep walking, which was dangerous. I ask myself once again, why God allow all these to happen that I can't go back to church?